Whether you get your social interaction at work, standing around the water cooler, on Facebook or catching up for lunch with friends, it seems inevitable that the conversation turns to griping of some sort. I can’t help but notice that much of it seems to centre around people’s general dissatisfaction with their relationships, families and jobs. I don’t know why, but I am so much more aware of it now. I used to let it roll off of me, but for some reason, this consistent negativity is really starting to irk me.
Here is an example. I have a girlfriend who complains a lot about, well, everything. It seems like every single conversation is engulfed in negative energy. Her husband is lazy; he doesn’t help out around the house, her mother is a pain in the behind, her co-workers are idiots, her boss is an even bigger moron and her siblings are all insensitive jerks. I am not exaggerating. If anything, I’ve toned down her words — a lot.
When it’s just the two of us together, I’ll nod my head and listen – or maybe I’ll have half an ear on what she’s saying while I’m thinking about what to make for dinner that night. It’s not as though she wants to hear any solutions to her “problems”. She just wants to complain. I used to try and help her figure out her problems with her husband, family and co-workers, but I came to the conclusion that she doesn’t want help. She’d rather live in negativity for some odd reason.
We’ve all been there. You’re having a great day, you get a call from “that” friend or family member, and after an hour of listening to them complain, you find yourself in a terrible mood and feeling negative about your own life.
It’s become very clear to me how much of a disease negativity really is. Now, I’ve learned to just stand back, watch it happen and marvel at it. It just seems as though some people spend their lives griping. It becomes them. I am no psychotherapist, but if people live in perpetual negativity, it cannot be healthy – both physically or mentally. Maybe wallowing around in the quagmire of negativity where there’s plenty of room for others to join them just seems easier than taking the pro-active steps to actually make some positive changes in their lives.
We all have those “blah” days. Bad things do happen in life, and there’s nothing wrong with talking it out with those close to you. That’s what close friends are for. However, there’s no need to let the negative energy drag you and your friends down. Life is full of challenges. Deal with them and move on.
As harsh as it may seem, sometimes you have to cut contact with these Debbie-downers, especially if you find your own mood being affected. Life is too short to be negative all the time.
Until next time,
Peace, love and vitamin C!